Top Ten Reasons That I Have Not Been Blogging

10. I’ve been cleaning the crap out of this house trying to keep it presentable in case a potential buyer might want to see it. (Five, count ‘em, five people have been through this month! Yeah, baby!)

9. I was organizing and hosting a baby shower for Brett’s cousin, Emily.

8. I was riveted to the coverage of Anna Nicole Smith’s death and the circus that’s followed it.

7. I’ve been listening to Trent read to me. Yes, I said READ to ME! (Sam I am! That Sam I am! I do not like green eggs and ham!)

6. I’ve been dealing with the behavior of the snotty girls in Allison’s class, and their mothers. (More on that in another post. I promise. Gotta vent!)

5. I’ve been learning about The Secret.

4. I’ve been perfecting a way to get into the pantry to sneak a Girl Scout cookie without the cellophane giving me away. (Oh wait, no one is here now! Be right back…)

3. I’ve been training to run the Sarasota Marathon. Okay…it’s really just the 5K. But either way I’ve been running my ass off! Gotta burn off the damn cookies….

2. Brett Someone suggested that I might be spending too much time on the computer. *clears throat and rolls eyes*

And the number one reason I have not been blogging is…..

1. I just didn’t feel like it, dammit!

This is not a MONTHLY blog, really

I haven’t been posting.

Not because I haven’t wanted to, because I do think in “blog post” terms on most days. I am often thinking “oh, this would make a good post” and then by the end of the day there has just not been the intellectual energy to write about it. Time has been tighter, since I have been subbing a bit more lately, but honestly it is the “perfection” thing that has me bogged down.

Even though I haven’t been writing, I have still been reading my favorite blogs religiously and I click away from many of them, who post just about Every. Single. Day. with this incredible envy. They obviously sit down and whip out their posts each day as part of their routine. Sometimes they write about “blog burnout” or “writer’s block”, but pretty much they are like the mailman: come rain, hail, sleet or snow……somehow they are just there.

Not me.

Nooooo. I have to sit and weigh every word. I have to turn something I really like to do and often comes pretty easily into something that is hard and laborious because I might not say it just the right way. So let’s just not say it all, right? I mean, it takes TIME to think of all the right words, and I just haven’t had enough to do that. Hence the monthlong gap between posts. I’m not sure if anyone even reads me anymore. Gah!

So my goal is to try to post daily. No thinking too much allowed. Just writing.

See you tomorrow?

Hi, my name is Kim. I am a blogoholic.

Okay. Trent has been up a lot in the middle of the night this week. I don’t know if it is the change in the schedule from school to summer or what. But last night he came to get me at 4 a.m. so I could… Fix. His. Covers. Hello? You need me for what? Of course the light bulb in the night light had burned out, which did not help matters. So by the time I fished out a new bulb I was wide awake. Not a happy place to be at 4 a.m.

Now this would not have been that big of a deal if I had gone to bed at my normal 10:30 or 11:00 time, EXCEPT that I had been up on the computer until almost one, so I had not been asleep that long. The reason that I was up so late you might ask? Um…..well….blogging. *wince*

Not just writing a post, mind you, because I haven’t done a lot of that lately. But reading. Reading a LOT of other blogs.

And here’s the scary part. When I was up at 4 a.m. and I immediately started to think how this would make a good post, I realized this: Maybe I have a problem.

Now let me preface the rest of this post with this: My husband loves me. I really believe he does. He is an amazing man. He cooks. He cleans. He is a super dad. But he really thinks I have LOST MY MIND. And this is okay, I guess, since I think I may have also.

But he commented last night, “Honey, I can’t believe how much time you have spent on the computer tonight. And last night.”

“Hmmm? It hasn’t been that long! Where are the kids? Wait, just let me finish reading this…….” THAT was my reaction.

I have a problem.

It all started this week with this. Which led me to this really neat blogging contest. Which is what the post before this one, called Magic, was all about. Which led me here, which led me here and then here. Yikes! Before I knew it I had found what seemed like some really cool people who think a lot like I do. I mean sometimes it seems like they could be writing MY words. And so I HAVE to comment on them. Or they don’t think like me at all and I have gained a new perspective from them. Either way, I think I love it.

I am actually SAD when I go to a site and there is no new post!

It is addictive, this blogging thing. I started it as an attempt at trying something new that looked like fun. But I guess people get hooked on drugs the same way. I have always heard about people who are hooked on the internet. I NEVER thought I would be one. So I guess the good news is I have admitted the problem…so I am on the road to recovery.

Maybe I should start setting a timer?

Maybe. Right after I check out this!

Planting the first seed…..

Being 38 years old, I’d like to think that I have become the kind of person who will try almost anything once.

Ten years ago that definitely would have never been me. So let’s just say that I have done some growing up and leave it at that. And I guess I can cross this off of my “things to try” list…..my own blog.

This will be a good challenge for me, I think, since I tend to be a very self critical person. A perfectionist, if you will. I wonder if any of you who know me is surprised by this. ;>) It will be interesting to see how many times I can write a post without going back later and thinking “What the hell did you say that for?” The second test will be to just let go of it. The third will be to get the computer part right. (I already wrote this post once and lost it! I could cry!)

I think people who enjoy reading blogs might be the same kind of people who enjoy “reality” TV. There is something fascinating about getting a glimpse of someone else’s life without them knowing that you are watching…..or reading. I can’t help it…..call me curious….I am SO one of those people.

Remember when people used to write things they wanted no one else to see in diaries with little locks and keys? (Who do they think they ARE trying to keep their thoughts private?!) I realize that people who write in online journals about their lives KNOW that other people will actually find out what they think, but sometimes it really feels like you’re peeking!

There is a blog that I read religiously, along with the ones on Hayesvision (yay Patrick and Em!), that is written by a woman in Utah that is the mother of four children, the wife of an online cartoonist, and an expert at frugal living. Her husband also happens to be a guy I once knew in high school. The stories she tells about her family’s lives are amazing and I am addicted. It’s not so much what she writes about as it is how she writes it. She can make the littlest, most insignificant moment of her day seem huge. She is my inspiration for doing this blog. I hope I can measure up!

If you do not already know me, here is the very short version (if I tell you everything now, there will be nothing to tell later!): I am a 38 year old mother of two children, Allison (10) and Trent (4) and I have been married for almost 15 years to the greatest guy ever, Brett. I have also been a teacher for the last 16 years and I am currently teaching first grade; an education for me daily, to say the least!

We live on the west coast of Florida, very close to the beach, but we are in the midst of piecing together a move to North Carolina (more on that another time). So I hope that you will check in from time to time, and maybe even leave a comment now and then.

I am looking forward to having some flies on my wall! Here’s hoping that you will be one of them….